I can see clearly now the rain has gone.

Despite still not sleeping very well last night, I did sleep a little and woke up feeling great. I was reminded by a friend that I felt a bit blue the last time Brian left for a week but it passed quickly. This morning, the sun was shining...for five minutes...but it was enough to cheer me alongside a large coffee, freshly baked lemon cake (I made four!) and a re-run of Friends. It would have been a different story if Lyn's husband Ken had not picked up the kids for me as the clock had stopped and we all slept in.

I had a lovely night with Anne and Karen, all three of us munching through canapes throughout the evening and enjoying a few glasses of wine. Brian took my camera to Greece and alas, the kids camera isn't working properly so no pictures which was a shame as the table looked so festive.

I served:
Parma bundles stuffed with goats cheese and crispy basil
Chilli bruchetta, chicken tikka, yogurt and coriander with a little caramelised onion chutney
Baked cherry tomatoes on top of crispy ciabatta with olive oil, parmesan and basil
Shredded duck with hoi sin sauce cornets and spring onion with cucumber stuffing
Homemade mini loaf with olive oil, balsamic vinegar and sea salt dipping sauce plus olives

I enjoyed all of them that old modesty of mine kicking in again and the duck, a new edition to my canape repertoire looked lovely and tasted really nice.

I had prepared Pauline's recipe for pakora and reheated it in the oven later on in the night; I served it with a yoghurt and tomato dipping sauce. That went down a treat.

Parma Bundles
Mix together a few tablespoons of goats cheese, the crumbly kind, some finely chopped spring onion, cucumber, tomatoes and yellow pepper-remove skin and seeds from cucumber and seed from tomatoes. Add a little grating of lemon zest and a squeeze of lemon juice. No ingredient has to be exact, just add roughly equal quantities and add extra of what you like. A sprinkling of sea salt...just a little, the cheese and prosciutto is salty enough...and a little grinding of black pepper.

Add a little amount of this to each slice of parma ham/prosciutto or halve the slice if you want smaller bundles. Wrap into a parcel shape and top with a crispy basil leaf; to make these, dip leaves in olive oil and place into a hot oven for a few minutes until they crisp up.

Chilli and oregano bruchetta with chicken tikka
I buy the bruchetta pre-done and crispy from Asda; any type of thin, flat crispbread would work just as well. Chicken tikka, you can make or buy the mini pre-made ones from the supermarket on sticks. I made this batch myself but have been known to buy it and it doesn't make too much difference. Separate the tikka into bite sized pieces, if buying or else cut chicken into bite sized pieces and marinade in tikka sauce and bake in oven.

Make yogurt sauce by mixing some chopped coriander, lemon juice, salt and pepper to half a bowl of yogurt, to taste. Add tikka bites and coat. Place tikka on top of bruchetta and add a little chutney (any kind of chutney would work) on top of that. These are very moreish, so make loads!

Baked cherry tomatoes
Halve tomatoes, sprinkle with sea salt and pepper, dribble over some olive oil and then some chopped basil and thinly sliced parmesan. Bake in oven until the cheese has started to melt and serve on ciabatta, bruschetta or crispbreads.

Shredded duck
Roast half a duck until cooked and the skin is crispy. Shred with two forks until you have a pile of shredded duck with some of the crispy skin shredded too. Thinly slice cucumber and spring onions into three inch sized strips. Buy hoi sin sauce. Buy little wafer Chinese pancakes. Cut pancakes into quarters, of equal sizes. Place on each quarter a little duck and one or two strips of cucumber and spring onion. Spread a little hoi sin sauce (or plum sauce if you prefer) down one side and roll into a cornet or cone shape. The sauce will 'stick' it together and the cucumber and spring onion should stick out. These are so dinky and look great. I served them with some extra shredded cucumber and spring onion on the side.

Homemade mini loaf and olives
The loaf is a standard bread recipe but divided into four small tins...you know I'm going to use those tins to death, right? I added a little golden linseed into the dough, just because I like it and it's good for you. I served it on a wooden board with two small bowls of the dipping oil and my heart shaped dish filled with my own olives. Good enough for breakfast, lunch AND dinner.

The pakora was made with flour, Indian spices, blanched spinach, chopped red onions, salt, pepper and water to make a batter, then fried in oil, both sides for a minute or two. I reheated them in the oven and they tasted great. Thank you Pauline! I think I may add some chopped coriander for the next batch, just to try.

The sauce was made by adding tomato sauce, lemon juice, salt and pepper to some plain yogurt. I also added chopped coriander just because I love the stuff (cilantro?).
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I ran out of milk today and wasn't in the mood to go seek some out as the rain and wind had begun it's usual descent homewards towards Glasgow. I needed a few tablespoons for the lemon cake and thought I would improvise rather than get soaked to the skin; I used condensed milk instead. It definitely gave a slight different flavour but it was lovely, thank goodness.
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A large shop was completed this week with the total bill coming to £118. £18 of the bill was for items other than shopping and I purchased two weeks worth of groceries plus stocked up on all my flour. I shall post the receipt once I find it, alongside the dinners to be cooked, consumed and smiled over.

Have a wonderful weekend.

My mood has turned blue.

Aaaargh. Never, ever post under the influence of alcohol, drugs, tiredness or rage. Well, I'm posting under two out of the four. As it's not yet 2pm, lets assume that it isn't aclohol and drugs.....

I didn't sleep a wink last night as Brian left yesterday for a week. Yes, it's his turn and I get to stay home alone this time. It always takes me a few days to 'settle in' as I feel anxious about the kids and robbers and spies, oh my! Kids and robbers and spies! I know I'm a freak but I accepted that a long time ago. I still check they are breathing every night.....

I was such a grump this morning, shouting at poor wee Lucy as I clomped down the stairs, hair askew, eyes held open with matchsticks; it was warranted a little as she was still in her pjs playing Monopoly of all things but still. A friend very kindly offered to pick them up to take them to school for me so the last thing I wanted was for them to be late. After barking orders and making them stand in the rain hey, they did have hoods and umbrellas, I'm not that bad, looking out for Lyn, I waved them goodbye and came inside, feeling spaced and strangely dissatisfied; probably because I'd shouted at them. Sometimes, a quick kiss and hug doesn't make up for it.

My bones were still sore from Yoga, having missed it for a while, I felt exhausted and blue, and knew I had a busy day ahead. I curled up with a coffee instead and that was when Shona called. Happy to hear her voice, I was cheered but half way through talking to her, I broke down in stupid, pointless tears, much to her dismay. No reason, nothing to trigger it, just because. She called me back five minutes later and of course, I was fine...exhaustion has that effect on me unfortunately and it passes as quickly as it arrives so we chatted for half an hour.

Wandering back through to the living room, looking at all the cleaning, tidying and work I had to do, I opted instead to start cooking as I find it therapeutic. I have Anne and Karen coming over this evening and I want to make some lovely canapes and bread. Just as I finished the parma bundles more on that later the doorbell goes; it's Shona and her gorgeous wee lass with a vase of flowers for me and a beautiful white seashell photos to follow. How lovely.

Cheered once more, I set about making the bread and had just placed it to rise in the cupboard when the phone rang. It was the girl from swimming development; a farcical argument ensued, me trying to stay calm as I realise they had mucked up my schedule, her trying to passively aggressively imply that the phone call I received on Tuesday was a figment of my deranged imagination and my stomach starting to ache with it all. As I realised that their mistake was not going to be resolved in my favour, I tried to calm down, suggesting with a sigh that I may just cancel two out of three of the classes. She gleefully informs me that I probably won't get my money back.

That sent me down the spiral of the flaming angry pit and I asked to speak to the manager who was not available but "may call you back tomorrow, maybe Monday, depending on when I see him". Or when he comes out of the pub. Oh, how professional. Now, my stomach is seriously sore, I feel drained and also a little bad for my barely contained seething: no matter how passive aggressive she was, I should have stayed calm as she is only doing her job she could do it a whole lot better of course, with a bit of respect, sympathy and understanding but hey, what do I know, maybe she only gets paid £3.50 per hour, gets staplers thrown at her and has no benefits.

So, as I began to calm down after my rant...mini rant I'd say...I take a deep breath and smile. I need to pull myself together, get organised and take my own advice about being optimistic; there is a chicken in the oven, the bread is rising, my kids will be home in an hour and I can hug them and make up for earlier. I have lovely friends, the kind who bring me flowers when I feel blue and tired and two turning up tonight to keep me company with wine, blether and a laugh. How lucky am I?

Now, if I could just find that Zantac.........